Finish Line

Now Playing - Turning Page by Sleeping at Last

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Hey all,

My apologies on doing a horrible job at maintaining this page. I'm sure you all -- I mean, whoever reads this -- was just writhing in anticipation for another post. Here it is. And I must warn you, it's mildly upsetting.

The past week or so have been different for me. I've begun writing for the UWM Post for the Track and Field team and the thoughts I've had to come across have led to me to the realization that I'm a senior. I mean, I knew this, but this means my life is significantly changing in a matter of months. Most of all, though, I'm almost done running competitively. To many of you, you think, 'Who cares? I'm excited to start a real life.' My issue? I've only known running as a life.

Since I was 4 I was racing; whether it was other kids at recess or in weekly 400m runs with the Kids' Fun Run back at home. I'm not ready to be done. Sure, I can run some road races (and I signed up for the Chicago Marathon, fyi!), but it won't be the same. I won't have a team that's screaming at me as a I round the curve at the last stretch of a race. I won't have a coach hugging me and swinging me around after I run my absolute hardest. I won't have teammates who bust out in tears when we win our fourth consecutive championship crown. It's depressing to think about. But it's all I can think about.

We had our informal girls' meeting for the indoor championships last night. It was finally our time, as seniors, to lead it and attempt to lessen the nervous feelings inevitably bouncing through the underclassmen's minds. Speaking to them as a position of authority and wisdom was a whole new sensation. It finally hit me: this is it. That every workout I've ever managed to survive, after all the treatment I've gone through for exhausted muscles, after all the agony of races that make you feel as if your legs could explode, I'm almost done. I can't think of how many times I've said "Ugh, I wish I would have done a different sport," or, "I wonder what it's like to be a 'regular student.'" Now all I'm wishing is to rewind the time and start again. Start my running career again, chasing my classmates during tag in elementary and winning the occasional informal footrace between the slide and swing set. It's crazy how you wish things would end and when the final lap is starting, you want to take it all back... to backtrack.

To think that this weekend is the last time I will probably ever compete at an indoor track. I've been doing so for about 10 years. But with that in mind, I am determined to make my last hoorah! on the track a good one. If I'm standing after a race, I'll be upset with myself.

I know that's a little depressing. But, blogs are about expressing oneself; at least, that's what I perceive them to be. They're opinionated pieces of creative writing that stem directly from thought processes that root themselves within our noggins. So, roll your eyes that I'm being such a wuss, if you want. But, if you're an athlete or had anything you love and live for come to an end, then you'll feel the same.

Until then though, I have to keep my head high. We're not done until May, or hopefully June. These few months of workouts have to be the best they've ever been so I can leave here with my head held high. I will end on nothing but a high note. That's a promise.

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Until next time,

erika

"Alone" is a bullshit word.

Now Playing - We Own the Sky by M83

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There comes a time when you're so entirely frustrated with everything that all you want to do is curl up in a ball in your bed, turn on some stupid RomCom and drown yourself in the movie's satirical hullabaloo until you fall asleep. This doesn't happen too often for me, but there are certainly instances where all I want is to scream my head off and sprint down the street naked. It's weird. You find yourself feeling this way and you think nobody can understand.

But then I remember, literally EVERY movie and TV show and song and book expresses these same feelings in its characters at one time or another. Then I realize I'm not alone. And that these phases are just that: normal, regular, standard phases. Weird to think that even the most outgoing, happiest of people find themselves at rock bottom on occasion. Just a thought. Makes you feel a lot better, though, huh? All in all, we're never really alone (unless we make it that way on purpose).

Although, sometimes having someone to share these times with and hold onto while they're going on would be great, but I'm just so damn picky. But that's off topic...

Erika

Football Savagery

Now Playing - You Can Be The Boss by Lana Del Rey

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"Daddy's using my toys again to throw at the TV."

Hi all,

It's the time of year where sports bars across the nation become a breeding ground for savagery and barabarism: the end of football season. I know it's been going on for a while and lots of powerfans have been loyal the whole year, but it's this time of the season that the claws come out and adult men pounce on eachother like high school girls fighting over who has the cutest homecoming getup.

I love that damn sport. Don't get me wrong. Honestly, if I had something swinging between my legs I would have undoubtedly been the star quarterback of my already highly ranked high school football team. Alas, I don't have a third arm so I stuck to truck-stopping girls on the Powder Puff field and chest bumping my other flat-breasted friends.

Regardless of my love for the sport, I don't think my eyes stop doing barrel rolls if I even attempt to watch games in a public location. Super fans turn into super douches. They may as well be the subjects on Animorphs as they switch from humans to wild beasts and start to butt heads like they're 7 again. Dudes calling each other assholes for cheering for Tim Tebow instead of Ben Roethlisberger... like, really? At least act like you have a head on your shoulders and maintain a little bit of composure. It's not only embarrassing for you, but also to everyone within a mile radius because undoubtedly everyone wet themselves just a little in fear for their own lives.

I was in a quaint, small restaurant enjoying cheap tacos on my college budget a couple weeks ago for the Rose Bowl. I live in Milwaukee and assumed tons of Madison fans would be crowding the bars and demanding as much Miller Light as possible. I was right, and that's fine. I love me some beer, too. But the second shit started to go down during the game, my life flashed before my eyes. I had no doubt in my mind that I would be dying that night, simply because I wasn't wearing a red shirt. This asshole was stomping his feet (he was wearing TOMS. Cool, but not athletic unless he rode his fixed-gear there) and cursing at the TV in front of everyone.It was like a child throwing a tantrum. Um, really? His girlfriend just sat there and twiddled her thumbs as if this was normalcy. I'm sure she knows by now that if she gets in the way of his douchebaggery then she's gonna lose an eye or a sibling. I wasn't even WITH the guy and my faced turned beat red at the sight of him morphing into a screaming toddler. I was just waiting (and secretly hoping) for his tantrum to turn ugly and a vessel to burst in his neck so the ambulance could come take him off our hands (and no, I didn't want him to DIE...). Enjoy your team, but come on, dude. Nobody expected their lives to be in danger by choosing to leave their house to spectate.

And to those of you who think that the "Bears suck" and "Aaron Rodgers is a God," well neither is true. Don't get me wrong, I'm a Packer fan. But in no way would I ever equate Rodgers to that of Zeus the Lightning God or Jesus Christ. And truthfully (although I don't really like the Bears), they don't suck. Unless sucking gets you making millions of dollars a year, then they suck a big one. And I'm willing to bet that if you were to go head-to-head with even their lowest of linebackers, your ass would smash so quickly into the astroturf that medics couldn't tell the difference between your face and Kate Hudson's flat chest. And while you instruct the players what to do through the television (cause you're obviously a better football coach than theirs), remember that your name is Bill and not Coach Awesome of All Football Land. So chill out, bro.

And the Packer game this weekend. Oh boy, what a horrible ending to a fantastic season. But they played like shit and that's all there is to it! Butter was most definitely involved during the pregame warm-up because they couldn't hold onto the ball to save their lives. So, I agree, I was saddened by the loss. But my social media go-to's showed me that some people brought sadness to a whole new level. People cursing at Illinoisans (where I'm from) about how it must suck that they come from such a shitty state for sports. Um, excuse me, first off: Illinois has nothing to do with the Packers' loss. Illinois can't really talk anyway because they Bears didn't do so hot this year. Secondly: Illinois is a great place and the word FIB is getting so overused that I'm pretty sure I don't even hear it anymore when people call me it. So, shut the hell up and wallow in your sorrows alone. Not everyone and their mom has to be brought down with your depressing ass. Especially if the only reason you're bringing them down is because of their location on the United States map. Pathetic. (Although I will admit, some Illinoisans were being pretty ignorant about the game, too, so shame on you).

WHEW! These things had to be said. Stop being bro's (even you girls out there) and just enjoy the game like it was intended. Then I can begin to feel comfortable leaving the confines of my home to watch the game and not feel the need to wear a bullet-proof vest when I enter a sports bar. That is all.

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Oh and Packers, there's always next year, babes.

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Until next time,

erika

Resolutions

Now Playing - Somebody That I Used To Know by Gotye ft. Kimbra

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Hey all,

I've never been one to make resolutions each year, but this time around a change needed to be made. Many aspects in my life are going to be different this year; track ending, an addition of another major, weddings, friends' graduations, you name it. With that, a new list of objectives come to mind and I hope it's not bothersome if I share them with you. These goals are physical, mental, emotional or all of the above, so bear with me.

1. Run a marathon.

I run all the time. However, it's not often that I feel like I'm in control of my own physical destiny. I get told what to do and how to do it day in and day out and with that, redundancy in the activity that I love takes over. With the ending of my collegiate athletic career approaching fast, I see several opportunities to expand my running horizons. So, why not a marathon? What a challenge it is to set a goal on both something physically and mentally draining! And I'm ready to take that on! I crave this challenge. I'm not being told how to do it or what to do, I'm in control of myself. With that, I'm more than excited to hit the pavement as a distance runner.

2. Do all sorts of road races -- including triathlons!

Obviously there must be a half marathon to do in preparation for the full, and I'm hoping to accomplish this at Summerfest in early July (just crossing my fingers that they get their shit straight with hydration and medical assistance). Also, throw in some fun obstacle runs that will undoubtedly push my body to its limits: Tough Mudder, Dirty Girl, Muddy Buddy, Women's Triathlons, you name it. I'm more than excited.

3. Find my match.

This doesn't necessarily mean love (although, that'd be wonderful). But, I'd be ecstatic to find that person that I mesh with so perfectly that there's no chance of ever falling out of each others' lives. Now, I have many people like that already, but why not add one more to the arsenal? Perhaps this person could be a fellow runner, someone with a love for writing, or just somebody who happens to be as obsessed with dogs as much as I am. And like I said before, if that person ends up being a man that I fall in love with, I'm not complainin'. Who knows? Maybe I've met him. This is when I ask God for guidance.

4. Get my finances straight.

Holy cow. I need to work on finding some good fiscal sense. Anybody else with me? Can I get a "Shit, I'm broke!"??

5. Travel (or at least set up a plan to do so).

Please, oh please, let me get out of this country... at least for a little bit. I can't fathom living in America for my entire life and not experiencing the other 6 billion people that live beyond these borders. And I don't mean going to London or Paris and seeing the sights (although I wouldn't complain), but I want to go out and make a difference! Whether that is simply meeting people from across the globe or going full-on into the depths of poverty and finding change, I want to do it! I need to do it. My heart hurts when I think of being confined within this United States bubble. I'd love to spend a good portion of my life abroad. Anybody have any advice? I'll take all I can get.

6. Keep up in school.

I gotta keep my eye on the prize: finding a job that I adore and being able to live independently.

7. Show the people in my life how much I care for them.

I think this one is self-explanatory. But, in case I'm wrong, I want to make sure those around me know how they've affected my life. And with that, I'd love to meet more people to further positively alter my life. I have amazing people around me and I can only hope that God continues to bless me with more. And I will show them, as well, how much they mean to me.

8. Befriend someone I never thought I would.

My walls shoot up when I find myself in social or cultural situations I'm not comfortable with. So, why not take advantage of this as an opportunity to learn more about one's culture or lifestyle? I see no harm in expanding my horizons. So, if that person ends up being a one-eyed Hawaiian Jehovah's Witness, then so be it! At least I'll have insight the next time I meet one.

9. Maintain better contact with my family.

My immediate family is spread out (I mentioned this before in another post, Thanksmas) across the country. Their lives don't intersect with mine every day anymore, and unfortunately, not many of us are too great at attacking this problem. I'd like to initiate that and heighten communication with the people who made me who I am today. In addition, my extended family and I aren't very close. I want to bridge those gaps and make strong relationships out of ones that seem to be very -- "fake," I guess -- now.

10. Intern!

Doing two sports since college began has led to a pit in my stomach that's screaming "You're not ready for a career!" So in 2012, I'm gonna go crazy on gaining some experience in my field! GIMME GIMME GIMME! Obnoxious, I know, BUT! with the job force the way it is, it's gotta be done. Not only for my career, but for a confidence boost I need in myself: knowing that I can do what I love and that other people will be appreciative of that and accept me into their work environment.

11. Be happy!

Whatever it takes (as long as it's within legal and moral bounds, of course).

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Whew! I intended that to be much, much shorter (as usual). Thanks for checkin' her out! Feedback, people, feedback! And please, let me know what your plans are for 2012!

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Until next time,

erika

Things That Didn't Matter in 2011

Now Playing - Boy with a Coin by Iron and Wine

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Hey All,

Tomorrow is the last day of 2011; sucks that next year we're all going to die! And no, I don't believe in that type of stuff, but I will be there to party the night before. You can count on that one, and that I'll be rocking out tomorrow at midnight for my last New Year's Celebration! Anyway, the end of the year has got me thinking, "What stupid things happened this year that were blown out of proportion beyond belief?" So, here's what I came up with (and these are my opinions, by the way):

Kim Kardashian and her Wedding

Okay, who the hell is Kim Kardashian? I mean, I know who she is, but why is she stamped on the front of every newspaper and magazine while leading a nearly pointless career? And I can't hate on her for that, but I can hate on her that she became a millionaire before even lifting a finger doing any sort of dirty work. I plan on working for a living! Not benefitting solely from the profitability of my last name (although I could join Hanson, I look like them). Not only does her existence in the celebrity world make me feel useless, her wedding was just... ugh. The icing on an annoying, plastic cake. And the news couldn't get enough of it! I couldn't watch TV for the next month without catching a glimpse of her ass that they somehow managed to completely cover with a white cloth. And I almost slow clapped to myself when I heard that her marriage lasted a whopping two-ish months. Pathetic, and makes "love" look like a joke. God has a sense of humor in that he created her and her family.

Michelle Obama's Clothes

I have that dress, too.

The Hats at Kate and Prince William's Wedding

First off, ew. Secondly, what is the purpose of smacking pictures of these ridiculous contraptions all over the internet and magazine stands? I hope that People Magazine decided it was necessary because they were too funny not to pass up. But the problem is, regardless of whether or not that was the purpose of publishing them, people started buying into that nonsense! I can't even begin to think of the rise in sales in the hat industry. Women: what are you thinking?? That hat that looks like the underside of a crocodile looks absolutely ghastly on you. Might as well finish your jelly and fixate the jar on your head with some rubber bands and netting. Costs a lot less and you still can manage to look like an idiot! (Sorry, this one was so mean! Ah!)

But, I must admit, I enjoyed the wedding itself thoroughly.

Charlie Sheen

Plenty of other crack heads out there probably have funnier things to say than him. Who wants to listen to an arrogant asshole talk about himself all day? Not I, and neither does Denise Richards. That woman knew to get out of there as soon as Twitter became a prominent news source. I can't believe how many trending topics were focused on him. Although, the roast of Charlie Sheen was quite entertaining. Everything else actually encouraged me to stop watching Two and a Half Men just to spite him and his sad career.

Chaz Bono

If I want to see a sex change gone awry, I'll go to my nearest dragshow, thank you very much.

Lindsay Lohan's Playboy Debut (cause we know there's more to come)

Let's get some class, Lindsay. What is it with people's obsession with her? Is it the fact that she used to be all innocent in "The Parent Trap" and now she's the next best thing to porn? If that's the reason people love her so much, then we have an issue on our hands with some creepy weirdos living within our country's limits. It's disgusting (and sad) to me that she managed to have one of the highest sold editions in the magazine's history when you could easily go online and look at pictures of her naked without spending $4.99. At least save some money if you're going to be a creepo.

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Wow. My apologies on the ferocity and mercilessness of my ranting but I know you agreed with me on at least one or more of these 2011 headlines. Yes, I realize these are money-making stories with entertainment in mind, but in the midst of deadly earthquakes, anti-government bombings, and gubernatorial corruption, we need to get our focus back on track. Let's not dive into that, though. YUP.

In the words of the great Charlie Sheen: stay winning. (ew)

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Until next time,

erika

Thanksmas

Now Playing - You and Me by Rosie Thomas

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Hey All,

This is gonna be a short and sweet one. Last week I had the pleasure of spending the day with family in Wauwatosa for an early Christmas Extravaganza. The day involved eating til I couldn't fit anymore in my mouth, drinking a few Old Milwaukees and Manahattans, and watching the Packers get spanked by the Kansas City Chiefs (WHAT?!). Anyway, it got me feeling a little bit regretful that I hadn't been very receptive to extended family until I became an adult. The fun I had yesterday made me think of how I used to avoid family functions.

My brothers both live incredibly far away; one in Florida (soon to be South Korea) and one in Tennessee whereas I find myself in the upper half of the Midwest. I never appreciated what good friends I had in them until they were eons away. Nowadays, there are times when I break out in tears in the blink of an eye just thinking about how much I miss them. With this, it gets me thinking about every single person that's watched me grown up and been there for me and I've never been overtly thankful for their commitment to me.

To my extended family: my apologies on not reaching out to you until as of late. I only wish that we could be as close as some of my friends are to their aunts or uncles or cousins. And to my immediate family: you're the best thing in my life. If I could take you up to Milwaukee with me and give you a warm place to stay, I would in a heartbeat. And to my friends (family) in Bloomington: I never have forgotten you if I haven't seen you in a few years. You've all personally shaped my life in one way or another, and for that I can be nothing but thankful. I can only hope that I did the same for you.

Anyway, ALRIGHT! Merry Christmas (late) on a light note! Hope your smiles are as wide as my ass is today after eating almost to the brink of death yesterday. Love you all (even my random Russian and German readers)!

FAMILY!

(minus Ryan. I'll put him on the bottom, looking sassy, of course)

Until next time,

erika

Music Gr8's

Now Playing: Drunk by Ed Sheeran

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Hey, all!

I'm sure most of you know this, but I run. A lot. And not always because I want to, but because I have this man I call "Coach" that makes me get up everyday at an early hour I hope to never see again after I graduate. Luckily, now that I'm a senior, the Boss Man and I are as tight as a camel's ass in a sandstorm. This means a few days a week, I get to practice when I want to practice, when most of the other kids have to wake up at the butt crack of dawn.

So, the other night I was exercising alone on the indoor track, running countless laps with my iPod blasting my eardrums out of my skull. Unfortunately, when I run alone for an extended amount of time, I have to listen to music to keep my mind going. With that, I got to thinking, "I wonder if everyone can hear what music is playing?" With further self-deliberation, I realized that probably none of these people in here listen to what I listen to when I run. Or listen to what I listen to ever! I feel as if my brain was telling me to spread the news about some fantastic artists that many people haven't heard of. I'd like to think of myself as someone who has a good(ish?) taste in music, and I wanna show you all a few. Some of you maybe listen to these artists, some used to and are revisiting them, and some have never heard. But I think we all need a little of these slick musical pros -- in my opinion -- in our lives.

So, here's my top 8 (as of right now and in no particular order):

1. Kevin Hammond @iamkevinhammond

You're probably wondering the same thing: Why am I not dating that sexy man? And guys, you can even admit that he is a babe and a half. Come on, you don't have to tell anyone. Anyway, Kevin is actually from the Kenosha area and now tours across the nation spreading his talents across America. The guy plays all sorts of instruments, including acoustic guitar and piano, which harmonize perfectly with his vocals. He has the range of an angel, and manages to stay cute during the whole show. Songs like "Broken Down" and "Maybe" will undoubtedly repeat over and over in your head until all you can think about is Kevin serenading you at a candlelit dinner for two (or is that just me?). Regardless, reward your ears with a little audio pleasure and give him a listen; you won't be disappointed.

2. Cas Haley @cashaley



Cas made his debut in the music world during the second season of the hit NBC competition show "America's Got Talent." The guy entered the stage with a smile and an acoustic guitar and blew everyone away with his cover of "Walking on the Moon" (David Hasselhoff looks like a complete moron in this video, as usual. Plus, once Cas starts crying, I cry right along with him every time). Since then, he's come out with two albums, both of which are ear-candy and definitely worth downloading -- legally, of course. My personal favorites are "I Wish That I" and "Dread Head Dream," which both remind of evenings spent with toes in the sand. With his reggae beats and beach-bum style, his music is best listened to in the summertime with the windows down or around a campfire with friends. Ahh, I just love Cas.

3. Rick Seibold @RickSeibold

Yep, he's cute, too. And his voice? Cuter (although I'm not sure if he'd like the word "cute" describing his musical style). But regardless of what I think, look him up yourself. An old romance of mine sparked my love for him, and if anything good came from the relationship, it was discovering Rick Seibold's music. Although the video is a little creepy, check out "Mary." Everytime I treat myself by listening to it, my knee turns into a drum and my hands become the sticks. It's probably annoying, but great music makes me do strange things. While you're at it, listen to "Can't Go On" and "That's The Day." Well worth a download.

4. Angela McCluskey @angelamccluskey

Okay, so to be honest, I discovered Miss Angela in a Morgan Page's beat called "In the Air" that featured her throughout. Her fantastic addition to the song inspired me to scour the internet in search of more. And boy, was I happy I did that (see, mom and dad? House music can be useful... right?). Her raspy, 1930's-esque tone captures the room and fills the walls with soul and emotion. Although some may classify her as more of a "folk" artist, I consider her more jazz or blue-grass... at least her voice is. Regardless, she's wonderful. Check out her cover of the 1937 musical hit "My Funny Valentine" and her smashing piece "It's Been Done."

5. Mike Golden and Friends @MikeGoldenDaily

Somehow, a friend of mine that goes to Eastern Illinois University in Charleston, IL, has a connection to Mike Golden. So, I heard of his music through her raving about him and his group. Of course, I checked him out and fell in love. Clanking beer bottles paired with his guitar and amp, he pieced together my favorite song of his, "Stay Here." His EP that went along with that masterpiece, Trees Pt. 1, boasted several other fantastic hits. The second EP, obviously named Trees Pt. 2, holds my other favorite song, "Bones," which makes you want to yell along in the car with your eyes closed (although I wouldn't recommend this). To my friends in the Central Illinois area who don't know about Mike, go and see him! Now that I live in Milwaukee I can't go to his shows, so do it for me! And report back!

6. Diane Birch @dianebirch

Oh, boy. Diane Birch. Her CD "Bible Belt" consists of songs that make you want to cry, smile, scream and dance all at once. I can't find many other albums that packs so many feelings onto one disc. "Fire Escape" combines a phenomenal voice with raw emotion that you just can't help but sing along to. Although, there's a good chance you'll be an octave below or above because this girl has some damn range! And find yourself toe-tapping to her more upbeat song (rhythmically), "Valentino." She's definitely one everyone should take a listen to; someone with this much musical talent deserves it. Plus, she's such a cutie for you men out there!

7. Lissie @lissiemusic

Messy hair and freckles and all, Lissie is the whole package. Her single "When I'm Alone" came on 88.9 Radio Milwaukee on the way to work one day and I scrambled to copy down the lyrics so I could find it later and listen to it over and over and over. Which I did, happily. She's got a folky vibe to her, and as you explore her album "Catching a Tiger," a little country and bluesy-rock are pulled in. Look up "Cuckoo" and "In Sleep." Mmm, well worth it. Her rebellious nature is exuded throughout her CD, making her all the more badass. Plus, she's from Rock Island, IL: a small town to which I have a lot of ties to. Way to represent the Midwest, Lissie!

8. Jarle Bernhoft @bernhoft

First things first, yummy. Secondly, if I showed you an audio clip of this guy singing, you'd never know he was a small, nerdy-ish (but in a good way) white guy. You'd think more along the lines of a leader of a gospel choir or someone similar to John Legend. Not only can the guy sing, he often performs completely alone, using his guitar, beat boxing and a loop pedal that allows it to sound like an entire band is backing up his outstanding vocal cords. The song "C'mon Talk" (yeah, that's live) made me fall in love, along with others like "Choices" and "So Many Faces." Enjoy Jarle; I know you will.

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Long, I know. But so worth it! Take a look at these guys and expand your musical horizons! You'll be happy you did, and I'm willing to guess that some of the songs I talked about are going to be blasting through your headphones for the next few weeks. Thanks for hanging with me.

Until next time,

erika